I'm a Joey Acon
Name Matthew | Date Sunday 08 Feb 09, 18:06PM
Matthew Storey

So three days ago I was on the receiving end of what can only be described as a 'drive-by'.  There I was, sat at my desk at work, when my boss came over to me and sat down to discuss forthcoming work. The girls that sit around me had just popped to the canteen to buy a cuppa. Everything seemed all fairly normal for 9.30am on a Wednesday when all of a sudden I inhaled what smelt like the inside of someones backside...and I was right. My boss jumps up and tries to blame the innocent girl sat opposite me. He quickly walks back to his desk just as the girls are coming back with the tea. I sit, red-faced, surrounded in more gas than Chernobyl whilst my boss sits and giggles at his desk.

A bit of a schoolboy prank I guess, but it got me thinking about wind-ups at school and what we used to say. Call me stupid but I never really knew what to say when someone would ask me if I was 'a benny tied to a tree?' as once you'd said 'no' your mate would be running around laughing 'Arrr, benny on the loose!'.

Surely we've all whispered in our mate's ear so he can barely hear it, 'W*nking makes you deaf'?

Joey Deacon


Or how about the joke based on the 80's legend that is Joey Deacon?
'I'm a Joey Acon, you're a Joey Beacon, I'm a Joey Ceacon, you're a Joey Deacon'.

Joey Deacon was the playground hero at our school. There was never a day through the early 80's when he wasn't mentioned. It was the best story that ever appeared on Blue Peter. Not since seeing Percy Thrower in tears after his garden was trashed by Les Ferdinand and his bunch of skalliwags had the viewers been so gripped.

I have to admit I was more of a fan of his best mate Ernie, the unsung hero of the whole saga.
Ernie did everything for Joey - cooked, cleaned and even spoke for him...describes Shella
down to a tee actually.

There was actually some wedding news this week. Shella went to church this morning (to be seen) whilst I nursed a hangover in bed. Yesterday we met the marquee lady and for an hour we debated over having an additional marquee attached onto the original two. At one point the marquee was going to be the size of Buckingham Palace but we eventually went for a half size addition to the current two which we'll probably stick the bar in.

Percy Thrower and Peter Duncan

Duncan dares yer, Percy

On the negative side, I was left speechless (eat your heart out Joey) when someone pulled out of the stag do, so if anyone wants to come there's a spare place going with the deposit already paid. Hopefully the place can be filled as someone needs to look after Usher Ashley.

The wedding invites also went to the printer on Friday. Without giving away the design all I can say is all those days as a kid spent watching Blue Peter will come in very handy given the amount of licking and sticking we'll have to do. Hopefully, when finished, they'll be 'skill'....unless you attended my school, where that was a rare bum disease.

Don't forget you can still sponsor us for the London Marathon, here's the link to do so online - it only takes a few minutes and remember to tick gift aid:

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