Big up the pre-nup
Name Shella | Date Sunday 01 Feb 09, 13:30PM
Shella Smith and Matthew Storey

I have finally had to admit that I am obsessed with buying bridal magazines; they are my guilty pleasure.  I find it impossible to resist their lovely, shiny, glossy front covers and glimpses of the delights inside like "Will he like your dress?" and "Do you need a sex pre-nup?".  I consider myself to be a fairly intelligent woman, so why am I so addicted to this stuff?  And why am I now considering the relative merits of a sex pre-nup and which clauses I would want to include? For the uninitiated, a sex pre nup is basically an agreement outlining how you will prioritise sex during your married life.  Brides magazine suggest committing to trying one new position each month for example.   This has got to stop  - plus it's costing me a fortune at £5 a pop!  I could've funded Champagne for every table with the amount I've spent on these magazines, so now you'll have to make do with Cava!

There are 3 people in this marriage

There are 3 of us in this marriage

Things have been fairly quiet on the wedding planning front over the last few weeks so I've taken the opportunity to get to grips with our budget.  Brides magazine claim that the average spend on a wedding is £21,901.  So we'd best get saving.  Seriously, you could easily get carried away with this stuff.  I just found myself considering whether the tables would look nice with 'Posh Party Poppers', 'Dainty DIY Crackers' and napkins embroidered with our initials.  In reality, this stuff is a load of tat.  I mean you're just going to wipe your chops with the napkins; do you really care if they've got our initials on? 

Name Matthew | Date Sunday 01 Feb 09, 15:46PM

Well, whist Shella's had her nose buried in those bridal magazines I've been taking advantage of the remote control and watching what Shella regards as 'crap'. Last night I found myself watching Paris Hilton's British Best Friend. Highly watchable quality TV I thought involving a gaggle of girls (that's the collective term right?) vying for Paris' attention by giving up their girl next door good looks and letting these so called celebrity stylists take over and make them look bloody awful.  These poor girls are complete suckers for fame, but hey I guess that's how Paris got famous!

Terry Wogan

Wogan might have left Eurovision but
he still has a place in our kitchen

Also on my TV list was that Song for Europe thing. I'm from the old school where Bucks Fizz still rule but now we seem to be going gung ho for the best song by recruiting Andrew Lloyd Webber (strange man) to compose the song and some Grammy award winning writer. We all know we'll finish bottom when the song contest comes round. Last year's shambles even made Terry Wogan quit. All these Eastern block countries voting for each other makes me sick. I mean name me one famous band to come out of these countries? Can you tell this quality TV I'm watching is giving me opinions? Much better than the 6 o clock news I'd say.

So back to Shella's fad of buying bridal magazines, I can remember as a kid I had a fad of buying Muscle Mag with the intention of turning myself into some big burly bodybuilder. I was always going to be on a hiding to nothing given the fact that my sister and her friends at the time called me a Cambodian. At this time there was an unfortunate famine in Cambodia and somehow I managed to be their sole representative for the UK according to them. Needless to say I stopped buying Muscle Mag and turned my attention to eating a bit more. I can still remember whenever I was invited to a kids party my mum always saying 'make sure you eat plenty' but there's only so many cheese and pineapple chunks you can eat.

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